A letter to my first love.

Dear first,

I know you are busy now, two kids, a job and a husband is too much for any woman, leave alone a Somali woman.

I saw you talk and smile and i knew you will be mine, little did i know it will be short lived & i regret it,to the memories both the good and bad ones, i thank God that i met you. Today i choose to remember the good memories, honour and cherish them. You were the noor of my eyes, we had youthful and playful years together, enjoyed poverty together and i respect you for that. You knew that i was a broke and malnourished teen but you still believed in me, i salute you. You believed that i will one day grow up, get rich and fatten up, my society associates fattening with prosperity.

Life changed when i met you, you made me believe that true love exists, i once again regret that it was short lived, honestly you made me love myself. Your “i love you” made me believe in humanity, satisfied my cravings for affection, you gave me the attention that every teen looks for, i may not have been worth it but you were generous enough.

My friends said i was too young to understand you and i insisted i love my women how i like my wine. Just in case i was to drink wine. i was not a good man, may be i didn’t even deserve you, but every wrong i made against you still haunts me, you were a gem and i was not bright enough to see it.

I still compare every woman i meet with you, and yet they fail the litmus test, you were the first in many including the standards. Your texts, sarcasm, smiles and inner beauty still disqualifies many.

I insisted you move on, i told you to let me go, funny story, as i write this i still can’t find your replacement, the space was too big for anyone to fit in.

Thank you for all the magnificent memories, the ones I get to keep and think about forever. Forever will they make me smile while I’m walking down the street as something reminds me of you.

Thank you for instilling self believe in me, for encouraging me to be a better man, for unconditionally supporting me whatever the need. You always have a special place in my heart.

I hope he treats you like the queen you are, believes in you unlike me, supports you. In short a better version of me.

You were my first love and will keep you in my heart always. Keep the smile 😚

Regards

Sugow Mo Mathey

Jerk of all